The Lego Ninjago Movie

Review by Bob Ignizio

Both THE LEGO MOVIE and THE LEGO BATMAN MOVIE were far more entertaining than I expected. The plots may have been standard issue kid flick stuff about being true to yourself and/or the importance of friends and family, but the jokes were clever and plentiful. Heck, THE LEGO MOVIE even managed some emotional resonance. So despite not having much of an idea what Ninjago was (other than having put together a few Lego sets bearing the trademark), I was hopeful that THE LEGO NINAJAGO MOVIE would be up to those standards.

It’s not, but it’s not terrible, either.

John Cleese with Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Sept.27 in Playhouse Square

For some reason the media zeitgeist is making a big to-do about this being the 30^th anniversary of THE PRINCESS BRIDE. But another medieval comedy has Cleveland Movie Bloggers of a Certain Age feeling ready for the old-age home (or, around here, just another crummy minimum-wage job I’ll hold until dropping dead in my late 90s). It’s been 42 years, believe it or not, since MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL.

Now comedy legend and Python troupe alumnus John Cleese is touring live with a revival of the picture. “John Cleese and the Holy Grail” is the name of the program.

In it a screening accompanies raconteur Cleese on stage, summarizing his own wide-ranging career, genesis of the Pythons, and the making of the best-known movie spinoff from the groundbreaking BBC-TV comedy team. 

Catfight (now on video)

[CATFIGHT is now available on home video.]

Review by Charles Cassady, Jr.

Though they will probably deny it, I worked for the Cleveland International Film Festival for ten years. And CATFIGHT is the sort of film-fest indie entry I came to know all too well, a guaranteed attention-getting hot ticket (well, of course it would be, as I would be writing the PR promos), with a high-concept premise and a hint of the unspeakable that would guarantee a sellout at showtime.

But after the festival, in the cold, harsh light of the mainstream marketplace…such look-at-me-ma!-I’m-a-cool-transgressive-filmmaker! stuff would just disappear into the annals. Maybe one or two copies might show up at Blockbuster (or more likely Hollywood Video, who dared try their own indie label there towards the end).

Separated from the excitement, and pretense, the hype and the ego of the film-festival scene, such movies just don’t look as special as they want to look. And such is the case with writer-director Onur Turkel's dark comedy.

Kinky Boots (August 22 and 26 at the Cleveland Museum of Art)

[KINKY BOOTS screens Tuesday August 22nd at 1:30 pm and 3:20 pm and Saturday August 26th at 7:00 pm and 8:50 pm at the Cleveland Museum of Art.]

Review by Charles Cassady, Jr.

When you consider that the alternative for shoe fetishists are crush videos, this British fairy-tale-in-more-ways-than-one is mostly harmless. And its verrrrrry gay-friendly premise got it spun off into a stage musical (naturally). Hard not to suspect director Julian Jarrold and the producers didn't have that cross-media platforming in mind from when KINKY BOOTS made its film debut in 2005.

Allegedly it's based on a true story (and comparisons to THE FULL MONTY won't end there). Charlie Price (Joel Edgerton) is a reluctant inheritor of his family's faltering shoe-factory business (est. 1895) in Northampton. Finding it antiquated and in a state of financial ruin, Charlie goes through a Cleveland-like round of painful layoffs when inspiration strikes - partially provided by Lauren (Sarah-Jane Potts), the sassy working girl he's firing, partially inspired by a strapping Afro-Caribbean drag queen Lola (Chiwetel Ejiofor) he accidentally encounters in London.  

Charlie, Lauren and Lola team up to re-position Price & Sons for a new niche market: cross-dressing men's shoes, or more specifically, boots. Ones with steel-reinforced stiletto heels for supporting big-and-tall transvestite's weight, a special pocket for a riding-crop, and a bright red veneer. "Red...the color of sex!" Lola exults.

Dave Made a Maze (opens August 18th at the Cedar Lee Theatre and the Nightlight Cinema]

[DAVE MADE A MAZE opens Friday August 18^th at the Cedar Lee Theatre in Cleveland, OH and The Nightlight Cinema in Akron, OH.]

Review by Bob Ignizio

It’s rare these days to find a movie as original and imaginative as DAVE MADE A MAZE. Writer/director Bill Watterson (not the Calvin and Hobbes guy, but rather an actor and voice actor originally from Cleveland, OH) has crafted a bizarre fantasy that feels like part BEING JOHN MALKOVICH and part low budget cult horror/sci-fi fave CUBE.

The premise is that Dave (Nick Thune), a thirty-something artist who seems incapable of finishing anything he starts, builds a massive box fort in the apartment he shares with his more responsible better half, Annie (Meera Rohit Kumbhani). Annie comes home from a weekend trip to discover this cardboard monstrosity, which Dave claims he has been trapped in for 3 days. He also claims he can’t find his way out.

Annie is, understandably, flummoxed by this. Why not just tear the fort apart? But Dave refuses to do so, and also warns Annie against coming in after him. The fort is bigger and more dangerous on the inside than it appears.

Landline (opens August 4th at the Cedar Lee Theatre)

[LANDLINE opens in Cleveland on Friday August 4th exclusively at the Cedar Lee Theatre.]

Review by Pamela Zoslov

Gillian Robespierre's new comedy, LANDLINE, has many traits in common with her debut feature, OBVIOUS CHILD, which got a lot of attention due to its abortion story line. Both films focus on the romantic/sexual misadventures of a young woman played by comedienne Jenny Slate, and are sprinkled with copious amounts of scatological humor alongside some funny and affecting moments.

LANDLINE gets its title from its setting, 1995 New York, where the characters inhabit a world of obsolescent technology: boomboxes, manual rowing machines, dot matrix printers, and the eponymous corded phones. It is primarily a family comedy — not for families, given its crude language, but about the family of Dana (Slate), a young woman who is engaged to marry Ben (Jay Duplass), whom she has come to see as boring, sitting up in bed as he does, raving about items in the Hammacher Schlemmer catalog. Dana finds herself attracted to an old college friend, Nate (Finn Wittrock), and ends up sleeping with him, putting her wedding plans in jeopardy. She leaves Ben for a time to move back in with her parents.

The Little Hours (opens July 14th at the Cedar Lee Theatre)

 [THE LITTLE HOURS opens in Cleveland on Friday July 14^th exclusively at the Cedar Lee Theatre.]

Review by Bob Ignizio

A trio of 14^th century nuns – Alessandra (Allison Brie), Ginerva (Kate Micucci), and Fernanda (Aubrey Plaz) – try to make the best of their lot in life in the deadpan comedy THE LITTLE HOURS. They fight among themselves, but come together to tear into the convent’s hired help. So brutal is their most recent barrage of insults and abuse that the gardener turns in his notice, leaving Sister Marea (Molly Shannon) short handed.

Meanwhile, Father Tommasso (John C. Reilly) sets off to sell various wares made by the nuns in the nearby village. Unfortunately he’s been getting into the communion wine and ends up overturning his cart in a stream, ruining everything he meant to sell.

Despicable Me 3

Review by Bob Ignizio

Reformed supervillain Gru (voice of Steve Carell) returns in DESPICABLE ME 3 (or DESPICABLE M3, if you want to go by the onscreen title). Also along for the ride are Gru's wife and fellow "Anti-Villain League" agent Lucy (voice of Kristen Wiig) and Gru's adopted daughters Margo (voice of Miranda Cosgrove), Edith (voice of Dana Gaier), and Agnes (voice of Nev Scharrel). And of course, Gru's diminutive yellow henchmen the Minions are back, once again playing a support role after headlining their own feature in 2015. 

When Gru and Lucy fail to capture 80s child star turned international criminal Balthazar Bratt (voice of Trey Parker), they get fired from their jobs at the AVL. The Minions also abandon their boss for refusing to return to a life of crime. Things are looking pretty grim when Gru learns that he has a rich twin brother named Dru (also voiced by Carell).

Harmontown (now on video)

Review by Charles Cassady, Jr.

Somehow, among all of the other things I missed while frantically working several jobs to make up for lowering income and higher cost of living here in the magic land of endless Recession, was an NBC-TV sitcom called Community. It apparently had quite a cult following (reminiscent of another low-rated NBC property, Star Trek), and now there's filmmaker Neil Berkeley’s HARMONTOWN, something very near Community: The Motion Picture. But watching it again made me feel like I came late to a party to which I was never invited (a familiar feeling).

HARMONTOWN is a portrait of Dan Harmon, a TV comedy auteur, respected by his peers (here Ben Stiller, Sarah Silverman, Patton Oswalt, Jack Black) despite his oddball, domineering personality and possible alcoholism. Harmon created Community, which, during a low-rated run, amassed fans whose letter-writing campaigns strove to keep it on the air. At one point Harmon was fired from his own show after a public tiff with cast member Chevy Chase.

Thus, the frustrated Harmon started podcasts and a live stage show, "Harmontown," that blended unrehearsed monologues, guests, and Dungeons & Dragons sessions. It rallied even more self-declared misfits to his side.

Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie

Review by Bob Ignizio

The series of books by Dav Pilkey that CAPTAIN UNDERPANTS: THE FIRST EPIC MOVIE is based on have been must-read items among the grade school set ever since the first one was published back in 1997. The question fans are no doubt pondering is, can screenwriter Nicholas Stoller and director David Soren bring the "Waistband Warrior" to the screen in a way that is suitably cinematic while still staying true to the spirit of the source material?

The answer is a resounding "yes".

Although some of the exact details have been changed, the plot of THE FIRST EPIC MOVIE starts off more or less following the first book in the series. Smart and creative fourth graders George (Kevin Hart) and Harold (Thomas Middleditch) are stifled by the drab surroundings and petty authority figures at Jerome Horwitz Elementary School. Their main nemesis is their principal, Mr. Krupp (Ed Helms).

Repost: Airplane! (June 2nd at the Cedar Lee Theatre)

[AIRPLANE! screens Saturday June 2nd at 9:30 pm and midnight and Sunday June 3rd at 7:00 pm at the Cedar Lee Theatre.]

Review by Charles Cassady, Jr.

Being older than dirt (poorer, too), I can remember when the original AIRPLANE! came out. Critics who earned even bigger paychecks in 1980 than I would ever get 30 years later, they practically all copied from each other (and to think, cut-and-paste off the internet barely existed then except at some elite military installations) in lumping the hit comedy-parody in with NATIONAL LAMPOON'S ANIMAL HOUSE and MEATBALLS and STRIPES as among the popular "slob comedies," of extreme rude behavior, beer and boobs and low-class buffoon-hedon heroes triumphing over snobs and authorities.

Baywatch

Dwayne Johnson and Zac Efron star in Baywatch.

By George M. Thomas

If there were ever a television show ripe for lampooning on the big screen, that 90s jigglefest BAYWATCH would be it.

Personally, I never watched the show.  I had better things to do like organize my sock drawer. But there are plenty of folks who did watch during the series’ run in syndication from 1989 to 2001. 

Yes, that’s 12 years of unbelievable, inane plots and enough skin for the time to start a soft porn site. But hey, somehow David Hasselhoff and his crew of beautiful people found an audience.

Snatched

Review by Bob Ignizio

Sorry to ruin anybody's mother's day plans, but if you care about your mom at all, do not take her to see SNATCHED. Even with modest expectations and an open mind, this alleged comedy can't clear even the extremely low bar set by this reviewer.

Comedian Amy Schumer plays Emily Middleton, a narcissistic woman who gets dumped by her rock star boyfriend just days before they are supposed to go on a (non-refundable) vacation in Ecuador. None of Emily's friends are willing or able to come with her, so as a last resort she takes her homebody, "crazy cat lady" mom Linda.

Fort Tilden (now on video)

Review by Charles Cassady, Jr.

I enjoyed Martin Scorsese’s AFTER HOURS (1985), a comedy about a Manhattan yuppie trying to make a sex hookup in the boho districts of NYC and finding himself lost in a nightmare urban-hell landscape. But it didn’t knock me over so much as it did the other critics. Maybe because, being better-paid and more prestigious than I ever would be, they knew New York and grokked more of the jokes. Or perhaps Scorese’s idea of comedy seemed to be heavily rooted in pain and discomfort (even more so in his renown Jerry Lewis collaboration THE KING OF COMEDY, which you’re expecting to explode in bloodshed any moment).

But either I’ve gotten older and more bitter (highly likely) or the AFTER HOURS formula found an even better application in FORT TILDEN, a corrosive new farce in which the same sort of idea is applied to an demographic just as dislikable as 1980s yuppies: 2010s Millennials.

The wry comedy from tandem writer-directors Sarah-Violet Bliss and Charles Rogers is, yes, set in and around New York City, now (unlike Scorsese) in broad daylight. Our callow heroines in their 20s, both jobless, live well in in a roomy apartment thanks to handouts and wire transfers from unseen but very wealthy and indulgent, cosmopolitan parents.

Going in Style

Review by George M. Thomas

Morgan Freeman, Michael Caine, Alan Arkin in GOING IN

STYLE.

Another week, another remake?

That summarized the initial thought about GOING IN STYLE.  There aren’t many modern film fans who’ll recognize that the film is a remake of a George Burns (who?) comedy.

The remake shares plenty of cinematic DNA with its predecessor, but has a more daunting challenge.  Burns and co-stars Art Carney and Lee Strasburg were veterans and legends by that time.

Who could director Zach Braff get to match that pedigree?  He pulls it off by giving us three Oscar winners in Michael Caine, Morgan Freeman and Alan Arkin.

Gigli (April 7th and 8th at the Cleveland Cinematheque)

]GIGLI screens Friday April 7th at 9:30 pm and Saturday April 8th at 7:00 pm at the Cleveland Cinematheque.]

Review by Charles Cassady, Jr.

Feeling like a tedious actors' workshop exercise that got exposed to ego radiation and grew into the Unwatchable Hulk, GIGLI became infamous during the production phase for a high-profile love affair between stars Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez.

That was the good news...or the bad news, as the case may be. The movie ended up the worse news, as a big-budget flop during its 2003 release.

Wilson

By Pamela Zoslov

Dan Clowes' Wilson is the kind of character that has long excited the imaginations of novelists, indie filmmakers and cartoonists like Clowes: a misanthropic loser who nonetheless feels superior to everyone else, and who spouts his cynical existential philosophy everywhere he goes. The type appeared in examples as diverse as John Kennedy Toole's A Confederacy of Dunces, in the mumblecore movie GREENBERG, and in the American Splendor of Cleveland's Harvey Pekar.

Wilson first appeared in an illustrated book (Clowes hates the term “graphic novel”) in 2010 consisting of one-page stories starring the bespectacled (like the artist), balding (ditto) Wilson, a well-read, aimless son of a college professor who finds himself alone after his father dies and his only friends move away. The book elliptically tells the story of how Wilson finds his ex-wife, Pippi, and learns that she gave up their baby daughter for adoption. Suddenly hungry for familial connection, Wilson insists that Pippi accompany him on a journey to reconnect with the teenage daughter he didn't know he had, who's being raised in the suburbs by a wealthy family.

Donald Cried (opens March 17th at the Cedar Lee Theatre)

[DONALD CRIED opens in Cleveland on Friday March 17th exclusively at the Cedar Lee Theatre.]

Review by Bob Ignizio

The manboy. The slacker. The lovable loser. Call him what you will, but he's become a staple of modern films. Usually portrayed as benign, and often depicted as possessing a kind of wisdom about life that those who give in to maturity and responsibility lack, you've seen these sort of characters in films like JEFF WHO LIVES AT HOME, OUR IDIOT BROTHER, PINEAPPLE EXPRESS, and many more. DONALD CRIED presents us with the creepier and more annoying flipside of the characters in those films.

But before we meet Donald, the manboy of the film's title, we meet Peter (Jesse Wakeman). Peter works in the finance business in the big city. When his grandmother passes away, he has to return home to pick up her belongings and her ashes, and set up the sale of her home. It should be a relatively quick and easy process, but the loss of his wallet and a car that won't start throw a wrench into things.

The Brand New Testament (March 3rd and 5th at the Cleveland Cinematheque)

[THE BRAND NEW TESTAMENT screens Friday March 3rd at 9:00 pm and Sunday March 5th at 4:00 pm at the Cleveland Cinematheque.]

Review by Bob Ignizio

Directed and co-written by Jaco Van Dormael, THE BRAND NEW TESTAMENT wastes no time announcing its sacrilegious intentions. It begins with God's 10-year-old daughter, Ea (Pili Groyne), informing us via narration that once she added her 6 apostles to her brother's 12, the world became a better place. "God exists," she explains. "He lives in Brussels. He's a bastard, he's horrible to his wife and daughter." So yeah, it's safe to say some viewers will be offended.

The plot is set in motion when Ea runs away from home after being tipped to a secret escape route by her brother JC. Before leaving home, though, Ea decided to throw a serious monkey wrench into dad's creation by texting everyone the exact amount of time they have left to live. As you can imagine, this has major ramifications.

Uncle Kent 2 (March 2nd at the Cleveland Cinematheque)

[UNCLE KENT 2 screens Thursday March 2nd at 8:25 pm at the Cleveland Cinematheque.]

Review by Bob Ignizio

From the beginning, UNCLE KENT 2 is about as "meta" as it gets. Ostensibly a sequel to Joe Swanberg's 2011 mumblecore film UNCLE KENT, this film begins with writer Kent Osborne (playing himself) writing the script to the very movie we're watching. A significantly stoned Kent rides his bike over to Swanberg's home to try and convince the director to collaborate with him again, but Swanberg has no interest in sequels. However, he suggests that Kent find another director, as he feels the "character" of Uncle Kent belongs to Kent and not him.

So ends the first 12 minutes of UNCLE KENT 2, which were directed by Swanberg. And so begins the movie proper, directed by Todd Rohal. There are animated kitties. And a post apocalyptic riff that reminds one of Bob and Doug McKenzie's movie-within-a-movie in STRANGE BREW. Kent reads Ray Kurzweil's book 'The Singularity is Near' as he travels to San Diego Comic Con, and the movie eventually turns into a sci-fi comedy depiction of  "simulation theory" (the notion that what we think of as reality is really just a computer simulation).