Two For the Road (Febraury 19th and 20th at the Cleveland Cinematheque)

[TWO FOR THE ROAD screens Saturday February 19th at 5:15 pm. and Sunday February 20th at 6:30 p.m. at the Cleveland Cinematheque.]

Review by Charles Cassady Jr.

Wow, it's true, 1960s movies really were full of unecessary zooms. Ouch, "Wayne's World" flashback! To think my life would be so empty today that I'd be prone to "Wayne's World" flashbacks at all. But rueful, semi-nostalgic reflection (and unncecessary zooms) is what TWO FOR THE ROAD is all about. It's a 1967 romantic dramedy, and while the "mod" fashions, Euro-settings, fast-motion slapstick, Henry Mancini music and New Wave edits aren't Austin-Powers campy, they sure are noticeable. It stars Albert Finney as Mark, a successful but slightly a-hole-ish architect married for 12 years to once-unspoiled wife Joanna (Audrey Hepburn). Now, despite Mark's career success and a daughter Joanna dearly wanted to have when Mark didn't, they're both severely jaded about each other. During a road trip through the south of France they flash back on the ups and downs of their courtship and souring relationship over key previous excursions.

This was doubtless grownup stuff in its era, with candid acknowledgment of sex, infidelity, once-taboo words like "bastard," "bitch" and "virgin" tossed around in Frederic Raphael's tres European script. And you've gotta love the portrayal of a visiting American family, with its vapid wife, despicable daughter and a dork of a dad spouting psychobabble and absolutely useless with his J.R. "BOB" Dobbs pipe. Of course, the techniques are kind of dated, with all the sixtiesgasms - Mark's vintage 3D film camera, the Alfa Romeo automobile, the Henry Mancini score, the gratuitous falls into swimming pools, the cool animated-graphics credits of the sort that Spielberg would imitate for CATCH ME IF YOU CAN, and cigarettes served on airplanes. And of course the exquisite Audrey Hepburn succumbed to colon cancer; that's why the only people you see smoking today are at-risk types like musicians, schoolkids, filmmakers and the doctors and nurses on their break at Cleveland hospitals. But it's admirable how director Stanley Donen attempts to juggle disjointed parallel time lines, distinguished by Hepburn's changing fashions (I spotted the Mary Quant and I'm not even gay) and the characters' poignantly varying levels of happiness and discontent.

Even given the unlikelihood anyone now stays married as long as 12 years, couples today could find some food for thought in TWO FOR THE ROAD before they Make the Worst Mistake of Their Lives together. Whatever its dated and travelogue elements, the tale does impart considerable charm and wisdom. (3 out of 4 stars) OH NO! THE EVIL DARK SIDE OF CHARLES HAS JUST BEEN CREATED BY A TRANSPORTER MALFUNCTION! HERE'S WHAT HE THINKS: ...So, let me get this straight? I need this movie to give me an emotional boost and succor me through the nightmare of having to sleep with the divine Audrey Hepburn, potentially for a whole lifetime? Thanks, Stanley Donen and Frederic Raphael, thanks a lot. If that circumstance ever comes to pass, I'm sure your counsel will give me the strength to cope. You know what would also help? Leaving your damn zooms back on Rowan and Martin's Laugh In where you found them! (2 out of 4 stars)